Tips For The First Date
Whether you’re a solo female looking for love or someone who isn’t entirely sure how to meet people, you can do a few things to make your search easier. This article will offer tips to help you have the best first date possible. From preparing for the date to making sure you have the right conversation starters, these tips will help make your foray into dating much more enjoyable. So what are you waiting for? Get out there and start meeting new people!
Be Yourself
When you’re on a first date with a man, it can be hard to know what to do and say. Follow these tips for a successful date!
1. Be yourself! You’re the only one who can make this date special, so don’t try to copy someone else. If he seems interested in you, he’ll appreciate your personality more.
2. Don’t be afraid to ask him questions! He’ll feel more comfortable if you’re engaged in the conversation. And if you seem like you’re not interested in him, he won’t feel obligated to keep going, either.
3. Enjoy yourselves! This is supposed to be fun, so let loose and laugh! Not everything needs to be serious all the time…after all, dating is supposed to be fun too!
Dress Modestly
Dress modestly when meeting a man for the first time. This will make you seem more professional and confident. For example, wear a collared shirt instead of a blouse or dress slacks instead of pants. You can also choose to wear flats or boots instead of high heels.
Take It Slow
If you’re thinking about taking your relationship to the next level, there are a few things you need to keep in mind. One of the most important is to take it slow.
When dating someone new, it can be tempting to jump into things head-first. But doing this can lead to problems because your date may not be either if you’re not ready for a long-term commitment. Here are some tips on how to go about dating someone respectfully and slowly:
1. Let Them Know That You Are Interested In Taking Things Slow
First, you must let your date know you are interested in taking things slow. This will help them feel comfortable with the idea and ensure that both of you are on the same page.
2. Don’t Fall For The “I Just Wanna Get Up And Dance” Trap
One common mistake people make when starting out is falling for the “I just wanna get up and dance” trap. When someone feels like they have chemistry with someone, they may not care about taking things slow because they think that means their time isn’t valuable. However, if you want something serious with this person, then taking things slow is key!
3. Make Sure To Talk About What You Like And Dislike Together
One of the best ways to figure out if dating this person is right for you is by discussing what both of you like and dislike. This way, you can ensure that you’re both on the same page and that there are no hidden dramas.
4. Don’t Rush Into Things
One of the worst things you can do when dating is to rush into things. When you’re not ready for a serious relationship, rushing things will only lead to Problems. Instead, take your time and let things develop naturally.
5. Communicate With Your Date Regularly
Another key thing to remember when dating someone new is to communicate with your date regularly. This way, you can ensure that both of you are on the same page and that there are no misunderstandings. If something feels off, tell your date about it so they can address it head-on!
Bring Something To Snack On
Bring something to snack on if you’re looking for a great way to impress your date! Not only will this show that you’re prepared and thoughtful, but it may also help to break the ice and get the conversation flowing.
Let Him Pick The Place
If you’re looking for a date idea to impress your man, take him on a picnic! Here are some tips for making the perfect picnic date:
Pick the perfect spot. One of the best ways to make a picnic date successful is to pick an amazing spot. If you can find a place with stunning views or close to a secluded waterfall, your man will be thrilled.
Pack the essentials. Make sure you pack plenty of snacks and drinks, as well as some Blankets, Picnic Umbrellas, and Chairs. Consider bringing along items like a game or puzzle for when the sun starts to set.
Plan ahead. First, plan your menu and choose dishes that complement each other. Then, make sure you have all of the necessary supplies on hand before hitting the trail!
Take it slow. When it comes to dating, sometimes taking it slow is key. Don’t feel pressured to do anything in particular, and let things develop naturally between you and your man.
Make it fun! Whether you play catch or go hiking together, try out some new activities to keep both of you entertained.
How to prepare for your first date
One of the best ways to prepare for your first date with a man is by practicing some basic etiquette. Follow these tips, and you’ll be on your way to having a great time!
– Plan Ahead: Make sure you have plenty of things planned before your date, so there’s no pressure. This will help to avoid any awkwardness or sudden surprises.
– Be Polite: Always act politely and respectfully towards your date, even if you don’t feel 100% comfortable with them. This will show that you’re interested in having a good time and want to make things work out.
– Don’t Give Up Too Soon: If you feel like it’s not going well at any point during the date, don’t give up. Try to salvage the situation by being friendly and polite, even if you don’t agree with them or think they’re crazy. Most people are willing to change their minds about someone if given the opportunity.
– Make Eye Contact: Staring at someone for too long can be creepy, so make sure to break eye contact occasionally to keep things comfortable. Also, use small talk to try and get to know each other better; this will help ease any nerves either party may have.
How to make conversation on your first date
There’s no need to feel shy or uncomfortable about the conversation on your first date. In fact, learning how to have engaging and interesting conversations with men can make for an unforgettable experience. Here are a few tips to help you out:
1. Get to know your date’s interests. This is the most important thing you can do on a first date, as it will help you build a rapport and create something of common ground. Find out what topics interest them, and then steer the conversation in that direction.
2. Be yourself. If you try to be someone you’re not, or fake being someone you think he wants to be around, he’ll pick up on it quickly, ruining the whole date. Instead, be authentic and genuine – that way, you’ll feel comfortable and at ease.
3. Avoid being too personal too early on in the relationship. It can be tempting to share everything about yourself right from the get-go, but this might not be the best idea – especially if your date isn’t ready for that level of disclosure yet. Save those insights for later when things feel more comfortable between you two!
4. Keep things lighthearted and fun. Not every conversation needs to be taken seriously – let loose and have some fun! Laughing together is enormously beneficial physically and emotionally and will put your date at ease.
5. Don’t be afraid to ask questions. If you don’t know something about your date, don’t be afraid to ask them – chances are they’ll be happy to share some of their favorite memories or interests with you. This shows that you’re interested in getting to know them better and can lead to some great conversation topics on future dates.
How to keep the date going.
For the first date with a man, it’s important to ensure it goes smoothly. Here are some amazing tips for making sure that happens!
1. Make sure you have plenty of things to talk about. A first date is an opportunity to get to know each other better, so make sure you have plenty to talk about! It can be anything from your favorite movies to your favorite foods.
2. Don’t be afraid to take a break. If things get too awkward, take a break and return later. This way, you’ll both be able to enjoy the evening more, and there won’t be any pressure on either of you!
3. Make sure you’ve dressed appropriately. No matter what outfit you wear, make sure it looks good on you and fits your personality. Also, avoid clothing that might be too revealing or too conservative – something that could come across as rude or unapproachable.
4. Be yourself! If you’re being yourself and putting your all into the date, he will too. There’s no need to try too hard – if things seem like they’re going well, then it’s probably because he likes you just the way you are!
Tips for kissing on your first date
There’s no better way to kick off a first date than with a passionate kiss. Here are five tips to help ensure that your kiss goes well:
1. Pick the right spot: As with any romantic activity, choose the right place and time for your first kiss. A quiet restaurant or some privacy in your room works best.
2. Don’t be too eager: If you’re too eager, you may come across as pushy or even forceful. Make sure to take things slow and enjoy the moment.
3. Keep it simple: Unless you’re both extremely expressive with your emotions, don’t try to add too many fancy moves or expressions to the kiss. Just focus on breathing, kissing passionately, and relaxing in each other’s mouths.
4. Slow down for a second: If things start getting intense and physical, take a breath and let go before starting again. This will help avoid any awkward pauses or misunderstandings during the act of kissing.
5. Be patient: Kissing is an intimate act that requires time and patience to get right – perfect ingredients for a successful first date!
Whether you are a longtime couple or just starting out, there are a few things that you should know when planning your first date with a man. Here are some tips to help make the experience unique and fun. Plan an activity that is new to him and gives you a chance to take charge. Be prepared with interesting conversation topics, and don’t be afraid to challenge him intellectually. Most importantly, enjoy each other’s company – it will show in the end!
Chapter XX: Perfect Tips For Texting A Man
Texting is one of the most popular forms of communication these days, and for a good reason. It’s quick, easy, and can be done anywhere. But what happens when you text a guy and don’t know how to properly send him a message? Fear not! In this post, we will give you the perfect tips to text a guy so you can get the conversation flowing and ensure your interactions are as positive as possible.
Understand the Rules of Texting
Texting is a great way to stay connected with someone you’re interested in. However, there are some important rules to texting that everyone should know. Here are four tips for text messaging:
1. Be Prepared For a Response
Don’t expect a guy to respond right away. Guys usually take a little longer to respond than girls because they have more things going on. If you want him to respond quickly, try not to send too many texts at once or bombard him with questions.
2. Use Body Language and Voice
When you text, use body language and voice to communicate your feelings. Indicate whether you’re happy, sad, frustrated, or excited by using facial expressions and tones of your voice. For example, if you want him to come over for coffee, say, “I’d love some coffee!” rather than “Carry on without me!”
3. Don’t Expect Perfect Responses
No one is perfect for texting – guys and girls alike! So don’t get discouraged if he doesn’t reply immediately or if his response isn’t perfect. Remember that texting is a conversation, not an interrogation session. And anyway, the best conversations are never scripted – they unfold organically as the two people involved get to know each other better.
How to Text a Guy
Texting a guy can seem daunting, but with these tips, you’ll be good to go in no time!
1. Make sure your text is well-thought-out. The last thing you want is for him to think you’re just texting because you’re lonely. Figure out what you want to say before hitting “send.”
2. Keep it funny! Guys love a girl who can make them smile, even if it’s just through a simple send-up of their favorite TV show or movie. And don’t be afraid to use sarcasm; guys love a girl who can take a jab at them without taking herself too seriously.
3. Be straightforward and honest. When messaging a guy, it’s important to be upfront and honest with your intentions (or lack thereof). If he suspects you’re interested in something more than friendship, he may react negatively – so be upfront!
4. Don’t overthink things. Sometimes the most basic messages work best – nothing fancy is needed here! Just let yourself be yourself and see what happens.
How to Send the Perfect Text
Texting is a great way to keep in touch with your friends and loved ones. But, like anything else, it can be improved with a little guidance. Follow these tips to get the most out of your text conversations:
1. Use proper grammar and spelling. When you text, it’s easy to get sloppy with your language. Make sure everything you say is accurate and mistake-free.
2. Emphasize the positive. When texting, try not to focus on the negative aspects of your relationship with your friends or loved ones. Instead, emphasize positive things about them and your bond with them.
3. Keep it short and sweet. Don’t get bogged down in long sentences or paragraphs when texting. Keep things concise and to the point so you can move on to other topics more easily.
4. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. If you’re having trouble understanding something related to texting, don’t hesitate to ask someone for help – your friend, family member, or even an online tutorial guide may have some advice that will help you!
How to Respond to a Text
When you’re texting a guy, there are a few things to keep in mind. Here are some tips on how to text a guy perfectly:
1. Start with a positive message. It can be tempting to start your text by saying, “Hey, I saw you at the bar the other night and thought you were cute.” But this will likely make him uncomfortable – instead, start by saying something like, “Hey, how are you today? The other night, I saw you at the bar and thought you looked really good.” This way, he knows that you respect his time and know what he looks like.
2. Make sure your texts are short and sweet. Guys love it when they get little messages from us – they think we’re more invested in them than we actually are! Try to keep your texts under two minutes long; this way, he won’t feel rushed or pressured to respond (and he may actually enjoy getting messages from you more!).
3. Don’t be too forward with your texts. Guys want us to be interested in them. Still, they don’t want us to come on too strong – so be sure not to overshare info about yourself or ask for too much information straight away! Let him get to know you better over time (just be conscious of not overwhelming him).
4. Pay attention to his interests. Guys love when we pay attention to what they like, so ask about his interests and share something you know he’d enjoy. This way, you can show him that you really care about him and want to get to know him better.
5. Don’t be afraid to send a flirty text. If you think he might be interested in you, don’t be afraid to flirt a little bit – after all, guys love a girl who knows how to put on a good show! However, ensure your texts are still respectful and don’t cross boundaries.
The Perfect Way to End a Text
Texting is a great way to keep in touch with someone you care about. It’s fast, easy, and usually doesn’t require much time or effort. However, there are some things to keep in mind when text messaging someone. Here are five tips for the perfect text message:
1. Make sure your message is short and sweet.
2. Avoid sending too many messages at once. This will only make it more difficult for the other person to respond.
3. If you want to try something more romantic, send a handwritten letter instead of a text message.
4. Keep in mind the person’s time zone when texting them. Some people may not be available until later in the day or night, so be sure to send your message at the right time!
5. And finally, don’t forget to have fun with it! Texting can be a way to connect with someone you care about, so it’s important to enjoy yourself while doing it!
Know What To Text Him
Texting is a great way to keep in touch with your guy friends and boyfriend, but there are a few things you need to know before you start typing. For starters, text properly! Whether you’re sending a quick hello or letting your boy know you’re thinking of him, making sure your text messages are clear and concise will make them more likely to get read. And if something important comes up while he’s out of town or busy, don’t worry – you can always call or FaceTime him when he gets back.
When writing interesting texts, don’t be afraid to mix them up. A little bit of humor can go a long way, and sometimes the simplest things (like saying how much you missed him) can mean the most. And finally, don’t be afraid to show your affection in words and actions – after all, those little touches mean everything when it comes to being close to someone we love.
Use Humor If Possible
Texting can be a fun way to connect with someone – especially if you have a good sense of humor! Here are some tips to help you text like a pro:
1. Keep things light and funny. This is key, especially if you’re trying to attract a guy who may not be the most chatty person. Be yourself, and don’t try to be something you’re not – which is likely to come across as fake or insincere.
2. Use active voice when texting. This will sound more enthusiastic and engaging than passive voice, which can come across as less excited or interested in what the other person is saying. Simply put: Say “I love it when you…!” rather than “You do such amazing things that I love it when you….”
3. Keep your texts short and sweet. If you can manage it, try keeping your messages shorter – this will make them easier to read and respond to (especially if the other person responds quickly!). And finally, remember that tweets are limited to 140 characters (although some people use longer messages), so keep your thoughts concise!
Get His Attention
There’s no need to be embarrassed when trying to get a guy’s attention. Texting is a great way to let him know you’re interested in him and want to talk. Here are some perfect tips for texting a guy:
-Start with a casual hello.No matter how shy or introverted you may feel, a simple hello will show that you’re not afraid to communicate with the guy.
-Keep your text short and sweet. A long text can be overwhelming, so stick to brief statements that pique his interest.
-Make sure your text doesn’t come across as desperate or needy. If he seems like he’s not into you, he’ll either ignore your text or send one back that’s cold and uncaring.
-Be creative! Don’t be afraid to experiment with different texts and techniques. You never know—he might just respond positively!
Learn To Keep The Conversation Going
How do you keep the conversation going when texting a guy? Here are some perfect tips to make sure the conversation keeps flowing!
1. Send interesting questions. Guys love getting questions in messages, and they’ll be more likely to continue the conversation if you send them intriguing queries. Be sure to mix it up, and ask about his day, what he’s been up to lately, or anything that interests him.
2. Compliment him often. Guys love compliments, especially when they feel like the girl is genuinely interested in them as an individual. When you compliment him, don’t just say, “You look nice today,” Instead, try something like, “I love how you always dress so elegantly.” It’ll show you really appreciate his style and make him feel special!
Make It Sexy From Time To Time
Texting is the perfect way to communicate with a guy; it can be even more fun when you make it sexy. Here are seven tips to make your texts fly off the screen and turn him on:
1. Use flirtatious language. This is one of the easiest ways to make your texts more appealing to a guy. Try using words like “cute” or “sexy.”
2. Send pictures that show off your body. Guys love getting pics of themselves that show off their assets – so send some shots that will definitely get his attention!
3. Use suggestive banter. When you’re texting, use phrases like “are you ready for this?” or “can I tempt you?” This will help set the mood for some steamy text conversation.
4. Be playful and tease him regularly. Guys love being teased, so don’t be afraid to shoot him a few lighthearted jabs in between all of your dirty talk! It’ll just add more spice to your conversations!
5. Keep things interesting by sending different types of texts throughout the day/night. Guys love getting surprises, so mix things up by sending different types of texts at different times of day or night – he’ll never know what’s coming next!
6. Compliment his looks regularly – it really turns guys on! Whether it’s telling him how good he looks in his shirt or pants today or simply stating how much you enjoy talking
Chapter XX: Learning How To Attract Your Man
Guys are just as easy to please as girls regarding love and dating. In fact, guys may even be more desperate than girls when finding the right person. But why is it that so many guys struggle to make a girl attracted to them? The truth is, there are a few key things that you can do to make a guy attracted to you. Whether you want him to take you on a date or just want him to think you’re super hot, these tips will help you out.
Be Yourself
There’s no one right way to make a guy attracted to you, but there are a few things you can do to start off the process. The first step is to be yourself. If you’re not your best self, then you’re going to stand out from the crowd, and he’ll be less likely to want anything to do with you.
Next, be charming. Whether being witty or simply having a good sense of humor, making him feel comfortable and at ease is key to turning him on. And finally, make sure that your body language is attractive as well. A confident and open stance are great ways to project confidence and show that you’re not afraid of him.
Be Honest
1. Be Honest About What You Want
When interested in a guy, it’s important to be upfront about what you’re looking for. Avoid using vague language or over-the-top compliments; simply say what you want and let him know if you’d like to see more of him.
2. Don’t Play Games
Playing games with guys can create distance and make them less likely to take you seriously as a potential girlfriend. If he seems too eager or unsure, it may be a sign that he’s not really into you – steer clear!
3. Speak Your Mind
If you think something on your mind might interest him, go ahead and share it – honesty is key here! And don’t be afraid to be yourself – guys appreciate women who are confident and comfortable in their own skin.
Listen More Than You Talk
There is no doubt that men are visual creatures. This means that when it comes to attraction, they are drawn to women who listen more than they talk.
Interestingly, research has also shown that women are also attracted to men who take the time to listen to them. The key is not only engaging in conversation but actually listening carefully. Hence, taking the time to really hear what the woman is saying can make a difference in your ability to effectively attract her interest.
Aside from simply listening attentively, there are other things you can do to further ingratiate yourself with a woman and make her feel appreciated. One of these things is being genuinely interested in what she says. Not only will this show that you care about her as a person, but it will also likely spark some additional conversation between you two.
Overall, taking the time to LISTEN more than you talk will go a long way in making a woman attracted to you and increasing the chances of developing a relationship with her.
Be Patient
There are many things you can do to make a guy attracted to you. One of the simplest is to be patient. Sometimes it can be hard to keep our patience when we want something. Still, if we remember that the attraction will eventually happen, we can avoid rushing things. Additionally, being friendly and engaging with him will help as it shows that you’re interested in him and his attractiveness.
Be a Good Friend
There’s no magical formula to attracting a guy, but you can do some simple things to make him feel more attracted to you. Here are six tips for being a good friend and turning him on:
1. Listen attentively
One of the best ways to show that you’re interested in what he has to say is to listen. Not only will this make him feel appreciated, but it will also allow you to learn about him and see potential connections. Paying attention not only shows that you care about him, but it can spark his curiosity as well.
2. Be playful
One of the best ways to put a guy at ease is by being playful. Suppose he senses that you’re not taking things seriously. In that case, he may start to worry about how serious your relationship might be. Being playful can help ease any tension and create a fun atmosphere between you.
3. Don’t be afraid to express your feelings
If something is bothering you, don’t hesitate to let him know. It may seem like a big deal, but if he knows that you trust him enough to tell him what’s on your mind, it may just make all the difference in the long run. If he feels he can open up to you without fear of judgment or reprisal, he’ll be likelier to do the same with you.
4. Appreciate the small things
One of the best ways to show your guy that you care about him is by appreciating the little things. Not only will this make him feel appreciated, but it will also make him feel like you’re looking out for him. Whether picking up a forgotten book or lending an ear when he needs to talk, showing genuine appreciation can go a long way in strengthening your bond.
5. Let him know how you feel
It can be tough to open up and express your feelings, but you must do so if you want a healthy relationship with a guy. If he knows you trust him enough to open up to him, it may encourage him to do the same in return. Letting him know how you feel allows him to understand and support you and shows that he means something special to you.
6. Make time for each other
One of the best ways to show your guy that he means something special to you is by making time for each other. Whether it’s going on dates, spending time together in specific activities, or simply communicating regularly, making time for one.
Understand What Makes Him Tick
When it comes to making a guy attracted to you, there are a few things you need to understand about him. Firstly, he probably views attraction as something very personal and intimate. Secondly, he may be looking for someone who is independent but also has a weakness or vulnerability that they can exploit. And finally, guys tend to be drawn to confident girls who also know when to play coy. By understanding these basics, you can start to put together the perfect strategy for making a guy interested in you.
One of the first things you need to do is figure out what makes him tick. Is he into independence, or does he just like being in control? If he’s into independence, try giving him some space and letting him lead the conversation. If he’s more in control, try intervening less and letting him open up more. Either way, it’s important not to do anything that makes him uncomfortable or threatened.
Next, pay attention to his vulnerable spots. Guys often look for girls who can take advantage of their weaknesses and vulnerabilities without knowing it. By doing this, you can build trust with him and eventually get him closer emotionally and physically. For example, if he likes talking about his emotions, talk about yours too! Or if he loves animals, show an interest in animals too – it shows that you’re not just after his body because of its looks or status quo.
Show Appreciation
If you’re looking to make a guy more attracted to you, here are some great ways to show appreciation:
1. Show social interest in his hobbies or interests. Ask questions about what he enjoys doing and get really interested in what he has to say. This will make him feel appreciated, and appreciated people feel more attractive.
2. Make thoughtful gifts for occasions or just because. A nice, personal gift shows that you took the time to think of and care about him. Plus, it’ll make him smile!
3. Compliment him often – even if it’s simply a “thank you” for something small. The simple gesture of saying something nice truly means a lot to most guys and can really boost your odds of getting your heart racing.
4. Be affectionate – even when there’s no need to be! Holding hands, putting your head on his shoulder during movie night (or any other activity), and general cuddling can make him feel loved and help increase intimacy between the two of you.
5. Let him know how much you appreciate him by writing down your thoughts and feelings about him – even if it’s just a brief note telling him how much you admire or love him… it might just be the best thing you ever do for yourself!
Don’t Be Pushy
You can do a few things to make yourself more attractive to a guy. One is to stop being pushy. Guys don’t like girls who constantly need their approval and insist on doing everything themselves. Be willing to let the guy take the lead, and keep your interactions light and fun.
Whether you’re looking to improve your dating life or just want someone who is more attracted to you, there are a few things that you can do. First and foremost, take care of yourself physically; eat nutritious foods, get enough exercise, and avoid using unhealthy habits like smoking or drinking excessively. Secondly, make sure that your personality shines through; be genuine and authentic, display positive emotions regularly, and be willing to give compliments without being forward. And finally, try to develop relationships with people who share similar values as yours – this will help attract the kind of partner you want. Thank you for reading our article! We hope that it has provided you with some helpful tips on how to make a guy attracted to you.
How To Tell If He Likes You Without Him Saying a Word
Knowing who is and isn’t interested in you is important to find a good man. It will assist you in sorting the wheat from the chaff and indicate where you should concentrate your efforts.
Here are ten nonverbal cues that he likes you:
– His body language is different when he’s with you than when he’s with others. Examine how he reacts during conversations with others, then examine how he acts around you. If he behaves differently around you, it could be because he is attracted to you.
From across the room, does he make eye contact with you? From across the room, keep an eye on him to see if he can make and maintain eye contact with you for a second. Try a small smile and see if he smiles back.
The retrospective. This one is self-evident. Does he cast a final glance over his shoulder as he walks away from you or leaves the room?
His actions mirror yours. People who have a connection will subconsciously align their actions with those of the person they are interested in. Examine what he’s doing and see if it corresponds to your actions. Scratch your nose and uncross your legs. If he mimics your actions, he’s yours.
Take note of his feet. If he’s interested, one or both of them will point you in the right direction. If he isn’t, they will be directed to an exit.
Peacocking. This is the act of flaunting and flaunting one’s feathers. If he’s always trying to outdo his friends when you’re around, he’s attempting to establish himself as the alpha male.
Invade his personal space and observe how he reacts. An interested man will move closer or remain in the same position. Someone who isn’t interested will shift their position so that there is more space between the two of you.
Flirt with another person and observe his reaction. If he appears flustered, he has noticed you and does not want your attention drawn to someone else.
Does he deepen his voice and push his chest out when you’re around? This is an indication that he is attempting to appear more desirable.
You keep running into him in places you wouldn’t expect to see him. He might go to places where he knows you hang out just to see you.
Chapter XX: Things You Need To Know About Guys That Will Give You the Upper Hand
This chapter will give you a peek into the inner workings of a man’s mind. If you’ve ever wondered what was running through a man’s head, this chapter should help clear things up.
Talking About Feelings
When you ask a man how he feels about anything, you’re likely to get blank glances or stammering responses that make as much sense as a talk with Gary Kasey.
Most men avoid talking about their feelings because they believe it is a lose-lose situation for them. They risk alienating you if they express their true feelings.
When women are insecure and want reassurance, they ask “feelings” queries. Men are aware of this and avoid questions of this nature. Questions concerning feelings frequently lead to difficulties because the male version of feelings never corresponds to the feminine version.
When you ask a question about sentiments, you may not be aiming to trap your man, but chances are someone has. Questions regarding feelings are virtually always loaded, and the man’s chances of providing an acceptable answer are limited to none. They are aware of this and will duck and evade queries about feelings as effectively as Mayweather does in the ring. The simple query “How do you feel about us?” to a male signifies exactly that.
We all know what you meant: “After three years of dating, are you going to pop the question so we can take our relationship to the next level?”
He is incapable of reading between the lines. He’s simply responding to how he feels about the relationship when the question is posed. He believes he responded appropriately and is taken aback when you do not receive the desired answer.
And you’re wondering why he avoids discussing his emotions.
If you need precise answers to particular questions, ask them. Don’t be surprised if he stumbles and stutters through them. Years of improperly answering this inquiry have trained him to dislike talking about his feelings.
Asking a man an open-ended question about his feelings about your relationship is akin to a stranger approaching you and asking if you enjoy being struck in the vagina. It’s incredibly unpleasant, and there is no correct solution.
Know That Guys Have Feelings Too
Guys may act tough in front of their friends, but they have feelings that can be hurt too. The worst part is that if you’re not tuned in to your potential mate’s body language, you may not notice when you hurt his feelings.
Men are trained to be tough guys and keep their feelings inside. Hurting a man’s feelings too often will, almost without fail, cause him to resent you. While women have no problem letting the world see them cry, men cry on the inside when they’re hurting.
Be aware of this when a guy you like is going through difficult times. While his outward appearances may indicate he’s OK, chances are he’s just sucking it up because he doesn’t want to look weak.
Reach out to him and tell him you’re there for him if he needs you.
Men Don’t Mind You Taking Control—Once In a While
Men like to feel like they’re in control most of the time. It makes them feel powerful.
That said, they don’t mind not being the one in control from time to time, either. Initiate the conversation and become the pursuer occasionally to make a man feel special.
Men Enjoy Porn—and They Don’t Enjoy You Messing With It
I will probably catch some flak for this book section, but it has to be said.
I used to detest porn, but I’ve had to come to an uneasy truce with it in recent years. I found myself obsessing over it, trying to catch my man surfing it, so I could confront him over his online infidelity.
All this did was breed an environment in which I didn’t trust my man and snuck around behind his back, trying to catch him looking at something that wasn’t a big deal. I’ve come to the conclusion there are two types of men:
• Those who watch porn and freely admit to it.
• Those who watch porn and try to hide it from the world.
Nowadays, it’s difficult to find a male who hasn’t at least casually Googled “Big Boobies” and viewed a site or two. Just because a guy enjoys looking at boobies on their computer screen does not indicate he isn’t interested in you.
Don’t be concerned unless your man is addicted to it and spends hours viewing it while you sit in the bedroom neglected. Every night, he comes home to you, and viewing a nasty movie or two may spice up your sex life.
If you’re feeling brave, offer to watch it with him. Be prepared for him to shoot you down. A man and his porn often share a particular bond that a real-life lady cannot break.
Here’s another suggestion. If you can’t deal with the fact that he watches porn, you should leave him. He’s unlikely to modify his ways. All he’ll do is find better ways to conceal it from you.
This dates back to when men would hide their skin magazines in the garage and sneak out to see Miss March.
It’s important to remember that he doesn’t love you any less if all he’s doing is gazing. It’s probably not worth fighting about as long as he isn’t aggressively searching out other women.
Guys Don’t Hate Clinger
You may think it’s adorable to want to spend every waking second with your guy. It isn’t.
I promise you one thing. If he isn’t bored of it already, he will be soon – and he won’t accept it for very long once he is.
It’s fine to tell a man you like him and want to get to know him better. It’s too much to tell him while you’re perched in a tree outside his house with binoculars, watching him.
I know a guy who talked to a girl for a few days before asking her on a date. They had sex when one thing led to another. He stood up and went to work, begging her to leave as he drove away. He returned home after an 8-hour shift to discover the girl waiting in her car in front of his house.
He liked her and would have gone out with her again if she hadn’t been so clingy. To get her to leave, he had to threaten to contact the cops.
Here are a handful of items you should avoid doing, lest you be labeled a Level-5 Clinger, the worst of all dingers:
Don’t show up at his place unannounced until you’ve been in the relationship for a while.
Don’t drive by his house to check if his car’s there when you call and he doesn’t answer.
Don’t overstay your welcome. You should leave before you’re asked to leave.
Give him some space. Suffocating him with your presence before you’re in a relationship will clue him in as to how the relationship will go. He’s not going to want to spend every waking minute with you for the rest of your lives. Trying to force him to will drive him away.
Stop trying so hard to make him like you. It’s OK to learn about the stuff he likes so you can talk about stuff he’s interested in. It’s not cool to find out he’s a Raider fan and then run out and get a Raiders tattoo with his name on it.
Avoid telling him how bad all the other guys you’ve dated have been to you and how you think he will be different. All this tells him is how desperate you are, not how much you want things to work out.
Chapter XX: Steps To Make Him Want You Even More
Have you ever imagined that you have a guy in your sights? You’ve had your eye on him for a long now, but you haven’t made a move.
The 5-step program outlined below will offer you the best chance of having this guy fall head over heels in love with you:
When he’s there, dress to impress and carry yourself with confidence. You don’t want him to know you’re insecure and get butterflies when you gaze into his eyes. You want him to see you dressed to kill and confidently carrying yourself. The way you feel on the inside affects how others see you. You are gorgeous if you feel lovely. People will start to see you in that light.
Perform some reconnaissance to learn as much as you can about his likes and interests, then learn as much as you can about them. This will put you in a position to learn about his hobbies and ensure that you share some of the same ones when you meet for the first time. Don’t become a private investigator and question all of his friends and family; instead, keep your eyes and ears open for mutual interests between the two of you.
Make yourself accessible at first. When no one is looking, flirt with him. Cast your gaze across the room at him. Try to create some sexual tension between the two of you. When you’re in close quarters with him, an “accidental” brush up against him can do wonders. Seduce him, but don’t abandon him too soon. You don’t want to be known as a booty caller. You’re attempting to make him want to be with you.
Once he’s hard on your tail, cut off all contact abruptly. Stop going to areas where he is. Stop establishing eye contact with him across the room, and stop flirting with him if you work together or attend the same school. The goal is to make him believe that he has gone from having a sure thing to being on the edge of losing you. Talk to other males and flirt with them as you did with him. Don’t go overboard, but let him be aware that you’re considering leaving.
Hook it up. He’ll want things to be strictly between the two of you. He’s worked hard and is about to win the battle for your attention. When he asks if you can be exclusive, tell him you’re delighted he finally asked and that you’re willing to forget about everyone else.
Remember how I said at the beginning of the book that I was going to expose my friend’s secret to obtaining men she has no right to get? Almost word for word, this is it. It simply works.
But there is one catch. It takes some practice to get it right. You may struggle with certain aspects of it in the first few attempts. You’ll quickly discover that you can hook and reel in the men you want, like a pro.
Chapter XX: Knowing What You Are Looking For
It might seem obvious, but it isn’t. There are many types of relationships, but I’ll narrow down what you could be looking for into four! Namely: Fiance, a friend with benefits, fuck buddy, or a financial sponsor. For better understanding, let me briefly define each of them.
What Are You Looking For?
Fuck Buddy
In this case, the essence of the relationship is sex over friendship. Simply put, you get along because of the sex both engage in. You couldn’t be bothered if you didn’t see him for a long time. Nor do you give a damn if the buddy calls only when he’s near your town.
A Friend With Benefits
Figure this out! You have this friend you enjoy having drinks with, hanging out with, going for games, and doing everything that normal friends do. On top of that, you decide to spice your friendship up by adding sex to the list. This means that you still remain good friends, even when sex stops. Remember, there is no romantic commitment or expectation.
In theory, being an FWB seems like the perfect idea for girls with commitment issues. Why is this the case? Because you are sleeping with a guy you like and trust and a dude whose company you enjoy, even when there is no sex in the picture. Unlike fuck buddies, FWB shares a superb friendship, and sex is something they do just occasionally.
Personally, I’d rather be a friend with benefits as opposed to a fuck buddy. I’m that girl who hates meaningless sex. I love a bit of mischievousness during my sexual encounters. I love communication after sex. I love to open up. This is only possible if the partner involved is someone you can connect with and one who understands your deepest desires and wildest fantasies.
And since I’ve been there, I’ll tell you what will likely go wrong in this type of relationship. Like any other affair, emotions can stir up with time, and you might start bumping into each other’s private space. Jealousy might kick in, especially when one of the parties decides to move on and get a boyfriend or girlfriend. Another odd instance is when you get emotionally entangled and accidentally fall for each other. If not careful, these issues and complications could ruin your personal life if not handled discreetly.
Financial Sponsor
Sponsorship isn’t a new thing. It has been there since time immemorial. During our grannies’ era, parents would book a sponsor for their daughters, who would then be married off when the girl became of age.
Times have changed, and today we have the freedom to choose our own sponsors. But who exactly is a financial sponsor?
In most cases, a sponsor is an older, moneyed, and sometimes married or widowed man who funds the lifestyle of a pretty young girl. It’s, however, not uncommon to find middle-aged and older women getting sponsored too.
This kind of relationship is always a trade-off that requires a clear-cut arrangement between the parties. Well, a padded lifestyle in exchange for warm company with a young, bubbly soul.
If your goal is to live life to the fullest, this is the ideal relationship for you. You can now drive flashy cars, dine at high-end hotels, go on vacation and shopping abroad, live in plush neighborhoods, and do every other expensive thing you dare to adore. So be it! Do what you have to to get what you lust after.
But come to think of it, it’s not all moonshine and roses. You may need to make sacrifices in your life. An older dude doesn’t have an adventurous and flexible life that could allow him to spend precious time on all his interests. Going out and partying every night are things he’s likely to consider childish.
An older guy is also likely to ‘father’ you in a way that might feel too controlling. After all, he’s more experienced and has achieved more extensively than you possibly have.
Simply put, you’ll need to be very hardy once you decide this is the kind of relationship you are looking for. There is every possibility of receiving much ridicule and prejudice from your age-mates. They are more likely to see you as a gold digger and your lover as an old pervert who just needs to satisfy his sexual needs with your young blood.
Fiance
Or should I call him a life partner? This is most likely the ideal partner you’re looking for; a serious guy and a long-term relationship that will lead to marriage and settling down with a family. Right?
You need to know that this relationship is an expensive gift you can’t buy on impulse. It needs the patience to develop. And you will have to sacrifice your time and energy if you want that ring on your finger. Hey!
A Checklist For your Future Man
A couple of years ago, I got fed up with all the city girls bubbling and needed to get into a fruitful relationship. I was in this clique of girls, and we decided it was time to capitalize on our lives. So, my friend Alisha called us for a girls’ night out and announced that she had an idea to help us settle down.
“It’s the ideal time to familiarize ourselves with our future boos.”
After that, she handed each of us some sheets.
The sheets were absolutely a revelation to all of us. The activity was not only fun, but it also served as a basis for what we needed to attract our dream mates.
Today, I want to share the same idea with you as I believe it will greatly help you.
Take a pen and paper and jot down your choices from the list below:
Relationship Title: Well, we have discussed this already. So, make a choice. Is it a fiance, fuck buddy, FWB, or a financial sponsor.
Partner location: Do you need him to live close to you, or is distance not really a problem?
Relationship period: Check with yourself if you need a long-term buddy, a short-term relationship, or someone on contract.
Preferred age: Note it down.
Mandatory requirements: Make a list of five qualities your candidate must have to be considered for the relationship, e.g., sexually compatible, a shared outlook in life, financially independent/stability, intelligent, and good life skills.
Qualities of interest: Though not mandatory, jot down five skills that you would be thrilled if a candidate possesses, e.g., loves children, is physically attractive, is trustworthy, has mutual interests, and has strong leadership skills.
Areas of flexibility: Considering that your candidates cannot be hundred percent perfect, make a list of five habits that you can tolerate (even though some people may view it as a deal breaker), e.g., smoking, drinking, race, religion, fashion sense, personal grooming.
Deal breakers: Now make a list of the top five attributes that you can’t deal with, come what may, e.g., Disrespectful, narcissistic, diet-obsessed, pessimist, nagging, etc.
Your perks: How will the winning candidate benefit from getting into a relationship with you? Make a list of what you are bringing to the table. Qualities that make you a jack point and a lifetime opportunity, e.g., honest, loving, intelligent, ambitious, compassionate, excellent kisser, easygoing, etc.
Why is this method effective?
The checklist makes it clear for you to verify who qualifies, who doesn’t qualify, and anyone who seems like a decent fit in your life. It’s a great method when looking for relationship positions, be it a mentor, friend with benefits, fuck buddy, sponsor, or a life partner. When you are perfectly sure and clear about the qualities of the right candidates, it will be more difficult for you to pay attention to time wasters.
However, I should warn you that most people in the romantic world are looking for long-term relationships instead of contracts and short periods of engagements. You’d better be prepared for this.
Chapter XX: End Notes To Keep In Mind
We’ve all made mistakes in our lives, blunders that have cost us suitors and fantastic relationships. You lost interest in a guy; sometimes, it happened quickly, and other times it happened gradually and over time.
We, women, tend to do stupid things when dating that cause a man to become aloof and lose interest in us. In fact, depending on how stupid your error was, a man may simply opt to put you in the “just friends” category or, even worse, “friends with benefits.”
Other women make these blunders even after they have built a strong relationship. Such errors turn off outstanding men, who regard it as a significant red flag that should be avoided. Within a short period, the male either breaks up with her or demotes her to “just a friend.”
To avoid this, you’ll need a set of rules that will allow you to make reasonable judgments and guide you through the perilous region of finding Mr. Right.
So, what are some of these clever dating strategies that will assist you in attracting the man who truly deserves you?
Do Not Move In With Any “Man”
I’m not here to tell you how to live your life, but I’m not afraid to tell you some hard truths regarding your personal lifestyle choices.
When it comes to relationships, you must use extreme caution.
Living with a man is a terrible notion.
Over time, I’ve realized that guys require an incentive to maintain any relationship. If there is no significant cost to remaining with his lady financially, emotionally, or socially, a man can easily bail out of a relationship when troubles get too much for him to handle.
That explains why a married man will work extremely hard to resolve any disagreements with his wife. His public vow and the socioeconomic repercussions of the marriage’s collapse motivate him.
A man who is cohabiting (due to your recent move-in) will not have enough external pressure to fight for the relationship to thrive.
Men and women have distinct perspectives on cohabitation. Men see it as a trial run for marriage, with the option to postpone it while reaping the rewards. Women, on the other hand, see it as a step closer to marriage.
Do you notice…
These two extremely different points of view have contributed to the shaky foundation that couples who choose to live together face.
Moving in with a man, unlike a formal marriage, can intensify troubles in your relationship, making it easy for a male to call it quits. Remember that guys get bored easily, indifferent, and tired of trying to make your relationship work.
Avoid Married Men
When I started dating, I had one rule that I always followed. I would never date a married man under any circumstances. Dating a married man is not only a recipe for disaster but there are also moral implications to such a life decision.
The married man may be madly in love with you, yet he will always be opposed to leaving his family to be with you. The legal concerns and shared living logistics – such as children, houses, and properties – provide a legitimate reason for him to continue having you as a side dish. Of course, this goes on indefinitely until you realize he’s just taking you for a ride.
I know some ladies who ended up in a dreadful mess after squandering years, only to realize that they could never be with a man who had already formed his life with another woman.
Be A Stepping Stone
Consider this: you’ve been supporting this guy like a good girlfriend. You remained with him during terrible times, yet your relationship is not progressing. This person has also never done anything to demonstrate how important you are in his life. You are nothing more than a stepping stone for him, my dear.
A stepping-stone woman is a woman who helps a man realize his full potential by blindly supporting him. She backs him up until he eventually leaves her for another woman. Many guys use this type of lady as a means to an end.
On the other hand, the mountain woman reflects what a man feels when he is at the top of his game. She embodies everything he has accomplished in his life. Her man is willing to face all the difficulties of winning her over. Indeed, every man dreams of marrying a mountain woman when he achieves the pinnacle of his success.
As a single woman who is still looking, the easiest approach to prevent being a stepping stone lady is to avoid sophisticatedL13] guys in your life. You know who I’m talking about: lazy slobs, mammas boys, guys who are never ready to work on their grooming habits, and those who are unemployed. These are simply ‘fixers’ who will leave you once their lives have been repaired.
The last thing I want for you is to be like my buddy Dona. She remained by her lethargic lover through thick and thin, only to discover that he had no plans to marry her. To be honest, I don’t believe you should gamble with your life, take chances, and give a man the greatest years of his life in the hopes that they will marry you someday.
All of this advice, however, will be dependent on the stage of life you are in. You wouldn’t expect your one-year boyfriend to marry you right after graduation if you were still in college. That would be ridiculous.
If you’re in your late twenties or older, a guy who shows no signs of settling down, even after dating for several years, should be dumped. If he apologizes and requests another chance, you should only provide it after emphasizing that things must go ahead. He should not express any reservations about his future with you.
As a result, a man must understand his desires. Never let a man you’ve been supportive of for a long period use you as a stepping stone.
Proceed With Just A Single Goal
To attract excellent guys and prevent dead-end relationships and miserable encounters, you must first understand why you are dating. Maintain your position and accept nothing less. It’s easy to be distracted by charming men who want to please you in every way. Unless you are in your right mind, you will simply lose sight of what you seek.
So, how can you ensure that you are not distracted?
Begin by developing a list of the attributes you truly require in a man and storing it in a convenient location where you can refer to it frequently. The list will assist you in weeding out timewasters and scumbags as you navigate the dating world.
When seeking a partner, it’s time to abandon the ‘I want a boyfriend’ approach. If marriage is your goal, ‘wanting a boyfriend is a waste of time on individuals with no long-term promise in what you seek. If you all want love and male companionship, it’s difficult to find Mr. Right.
Promise yourself that you will begin on a serious personal development journey in which you will date with purpose, focusing on men with marriage potential.
When you date to find the right man, setting boundaries with men who express interest in you becomes much easier.
Don’t Give Up On Your Deepest Desires
We’ve already talked about sacrifices, but I should underline them again. You should never sell yourself short only to keep the relationship, no matter how great you believe the guy is. Men dislike women who give up everything only to be with them, as much as sacrifices are important in partnerships.
Your dignity always takes precedence over your relationship status. Betraying what you love and believe in to get a man to love you is unattractive and unedifying. It says a lot about how low you respect yourself and your standards.
Always act as if you can do anything for your man only to keep him. Maybe you want to adopt all of your children, stick to your religious views, or do something else that will make your life more fulfilling. Whatever the case may be, don’t be too quick to give up your passions. This has the potential to ruin your life, and it is not worth your happiness or dignity.
So, learn to stick to what you believe and what is truly important.